Turning 40? Hang Out at the Beach!

Today at 40, I was walking on the beach trying to find the bathroom and I ended up walking so far that I was out of breath. My heart was pounding so hard I thought I was going to die. I said, “Lord, I’m trying to do the right thing. I don’t want to drink to erase my pain now. I want the ocean to calm me down today, I can drink at dinner.” I pulled myself together and enjoyed the beach even though I had to pee like a race horse.

I brought my watercolor pencils. They’re nice, Carand’ache 12 Color Classic Set. I brought those and some Strathmore Colored Pencil Paper. I drew the ocean in front of me. I was there in the afternoon so there was a rainbow of colors coming up. There was yellows, reds, purples, greens, blues, and browns. There was white foam that came up with each wave as it crashed against the shore. I felt so relieved to have my soul renewed by nature.

A group of Millennials came and sat next to me, about 10 feet away. They came in with their instruments and played their music. It was great. And then one of them started singing “In the shade, in the shade...” a Cannonballs Song (A Grunge Group from the 90’s) so I felt the way I did when I first heard that song. At any age, that’s a wonderful thing.

Here is a poem about lessons that I learned upon turning 40. This is for all of you who need a day at the beach to think things over:

Giving someone a chance to be your lover takes risk.

Avoiding risk will keep you from finding more chances.

Giving clear answers makes you good at taking questions.

Avoiding questions keeps you looking for answers.

Giving joy is not as hard as taking pain.

Avoiding pain will stop you from finding joy.

Giving access to yourself to another can bring you closure.

Avoiding your need for closure will stop you from finding people to connect with.

Giving relief makes it bearable to take life tests

Avoiding tests is just going to keep you from finding relief.

Giving advice feels good once you’ve taken criticism.

Avoiding criticism will only keep you looking for more advice.

Giving aid to those in need makes it easier for you to take help.

Avoiding help will only keep you from finding aid in your time of need.

Giving comfort means there is less time to take suffering.

Avoiding suffering only keeps you looking for comfort.

Giving compassion makes it feel good to take affection.

Avoiding affection will keep you from finding compassion.

Giving gifts keeps you from taking scraps of love.

Avoiding scraps of love will allow you to find your gifts.

Giving signals? Be prepared to take hints.

Avoiding hints keeps you looking for signals.

Giving strength makes it easier to take on weakness.

Avoiding weakness only keeps you looking for strength.

Giving what you need makes it more clear to know when to take what you want.

Avoiding what you want only keeps you from finding what you need.

Giving sarcasm makes it easier to take jokes.

Avoiding jokes only tells others you’re looking for sarcasm.

So here is my gift to you from me on my birthday. I hope this helps you deal with life.

Take Care,

Jess aka Sketchwriterjess

March 28, 2019

Read 1 Tender Tip from Love at Bar Height if you've fallen for someone and you want to let them go.

Read 28 Ways to Deal with Disappointment in Love if you're tired of being wrapped around the axle about things out of your control when it comes to dating.

P.S. Men and Women I want to hear from you. Do any of these lines resonate with you? If so comment below. I’ll respond to every single one.


  1. I know the feeling, I turned 40, five years ago , so this post I can relate to. Wait till you turn 45. ;-)

    1. Congratulations, gives me something to look forward too : - )


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